To The You That Never Was

To the you that never was, know that I loved you so deeply.

I first knew you in my dreams like a sweet whisper, thought of you each day like a vivid dream and nurtured your image like hope.

I saw him and imagined you with dirty blond curls, long lashes with baby blues and a smile that would melt your soul, if only we had let it.

Through him I saw you and imagined you as the part of me that never was.

I watched you crawl, helped you stand, followed behind your steps and protected you like a budding seed in Spring.

I hear your laughter, see your art on the walls, feel you sneaking in between us to warm your feet in winter like your brother always did.

I saw your dad’s heart grow far bigger than he could have expected or imagined, finally meeting the only woman that would truly forever occupy his soul and own the biggest part of his heart.

Not to say he didn’t love me too but I know it wouldn’t be the way he loved you, followed and supported you for life, the brightest star in his sky, the reason he could be gentle without exception.

I see you learning to ride your bike, standing on the steps on your first day of school and see you smile proudly after losing your first tooth.

I see you excel in school, at sports, have friends and crushes.

I see you learning how to drive, taking entrance exams for college and graduating with honors.

I see you grow and have each other, for life, even if you don’t agree with each other the way siblings sometimes do.

Or maybe none of these things would happen and that would be OK too, because no matter your path, our love is not dependent on implied success.

I have seen the you that never was and I need to tell you two things.

The first, of course, is that I love you like only a mother can.

The second, of course, is that I am sorry for the family that you never had, the laughter you didn’t get to enjoy, the hugs you never got to experience and the love you never got to feel.

To the you that never was, know you had a family that loved you and no matter where you may be, we are never far behind.

Advertisements

Modern-day Vermeer

She sat at the table gazing from the window to a world far away from the darkness of her living room as the afternoon sun gently made its way through lace curtains and painted her face in soft, poetic light. Like a warm filter added to childhood memories, it momentarily erased years of laugh lines earned through a life well lived while making her already beautiful skin look softer still as the gold from her delicate hoop earrings danced brilliant sparkles on her ears and on the small band that was now too small and thin to fit over her aging knuckle where it would remain the rest of her days. Although her skin was thin like paper and her eyes held the weight of a long life, she was still a natural beauty, classic, a modern-day Vermeer, and her beauty would remain timeless, even if only in my mind.

__

WC: 150

Prompt: hoop

sisu

If you want to participate, here is the link: https://carrotranch.com/2019/05/02/may-2-flash-fiction-challenge/

She’d been through a lot more than most but she knows it’s not as much as some others. Described as a rock, strong and sturdy, people were drawn to her strength like a magnet. And when she was young that need fed her soul, gave her purpose, direction, and she felt like a mountain.

But as the years passed, she learned that even the toughest rocks are worn smooth by a gentle trickle of water and strong winds can erode mountains into dust.

It’s a fine line she thinks between sisu and stubbornness and she walks it with grace.

Word count: 99

Prompt: sisu (a Finnish term for inner strength and determination)

Today, She Fights

The high road was marred with judgements; painful insults hurled like stones in an honor killing. She’d be pummeled into surrender, alienated into an orphan, as a lesson.

The traditional path was less damaging for the family meaning she must give in, acquiescing into soul crushing silence.

But not today. Today, she fights…

WC: 53

Prompt: the high road

Friends

If you want to participate, here is the link: https://carrotranch.com/blog/

“Charles, help!” a shrill voice shouted from the living room.

Fearing the worst, he dropped the plate he was washing in the sink and came running. “What is it, Ida?!” he said, panicked.

Standing on a chair Ida swore it was the biggest mouse she had ever seen. HUGE. GIGANTIC even.

“Sweetie. Come down off the chair. It’s not that big.” he chuckled.

“What? You knew it was in the house and didn’t get rid of it?!”

What he hadn’t told her yet was that since the accident, the mouse was the only friend he had to talk to.

WC: 99

Prompt: write about a mouse

For the First Time in Years

If you would like to participate, here is the link: https://carrotranch.com/2019/02/26/technology-pushes-back/

He was drowning in debt, working 60 hour weeks, micromanaged by his wife and under appreciated by his kids. After years of being worn down, his soul was thin enough to break so he planned to let it break in private, on his own terms, alone.

So without a word, he packed a small bag, some food, a few bottles of alcohol and headed to their cabin deep in the woods. He settled in for the night and woke to find his cabin buried in snow. How ironic, he thought, as he smiled for the first time in years.

WC: 99

Prompt: buried in snow

Who’d You Love, Saint Valentine?

If you want to participate, here is the link: https://carrotranch.com/2019/02/14/february-14-flash-fiction-challenge/

Roses, chocolate, love divine, who’d you love, Saint Valentine?

Was it love that grew from childhood days? Through teens and adulthood, until your hairs turned grey?

Or was it a secret love deep down in your heart? Love you took with you, till death did you part?

Or did you just dream of love, it’s beauty and grace? And see it upon every woman’s smiling face?

Did it veil your life, in all things you knew? A companion to walk with, never one, always two?

With roses so red and violets so blue, sweet Saint Valentine, we celebrate you.

WC: 99

Prompt: write about Valentine’s Day or love